The Jesus Revolution In October 27, 2001, more than a month after the catastrophic 9/11 terrorism attack, the Philippines received a seed. It was a prophetic word from Cindy Jacobs given to Pastors Jerome and Annabelle Ocampo. This is the prophecy … Continue reading
God is alive and His power is Real
I am realizing that the reason why I was solemn and down for weeks when I was Face to Face with Depression is because all the things that I learned and experienced before is not working right now. You see I grew up in a Christian home. My parents raised me in a Pentecostal environment. Healing and miracles were a part of my daily life.
- We just repent and receive healing when we’re sick and we wake up all healed.
- We pray for new clothes every school recognition day and God always provide.
- We would pray for provision for any type of need and He always there without fail.
I lived a compromised (in short sinful) life during my high school and college days but when I finally surrendered my whole life to God when I was 23 years old, there was no turning back. I pursued healing and I have seen almost all types of healing and miracles under the sun. May it be through me or through other His Mission family members.
- I led at least 4 missions trips with massive signs and wonders.
- Blinds see.
- Deaf hear.
- Dead were raised.
- Demons were cast out.
- Dark clouds would obey and go so we can continue with our crusade.
- The sick were healed.
- The lost were found.
- The prodigals came back.
- Provision came.
- There was even a season when we would literally chase the demon-possessed so they can be freed in Jesus name.
For the past 35 years of life, I seen and can prove that the Bible is alive and nothing is impossible through the Blood of the Lamb. I have personally witness His reality. I studied and stay in Germany for 7 months without spending any from my own pocket. I personally heard His audible voice. He gave us twins even if we don’t have any genetic history. Every season of my life, He has proven His power.
Until my Husband got sick…
Where are You Lord?
I thought I had it all figured out.
That I just need to pray and fast. That I just need to confess. That I just need to believe. That I just need to declare. I just need to speak forth His word. I just need to be grateful and testify…
These are all proven methods. Even the Generals do this. I have studied their lives. I have watched their videos, listened to their podcasts and wrote all healing and miracle scripture verses.
But nothing happened…
Yes we would have breakthrough here and there but the main issue is still there. One day, it’s all good then all of a sudden, it’ll crash. We have been in this for 4 months now. We are so desperate of His move, but it seems like He’s far.
He did not completely left us because His provision through other people is there. But how about the healing we’ve seen before? Where is the miracle that we daringly need? We have seen it all before, where it is now?
There are even times when we feel like we’re in our little tribulation moments. That His grace is lifted. That we feel alone. That we feel like He’s not there despite our frantic cries. That we are left with our choice to still believe despite the lost of emotions and what’s tangible.
I guess real faith is not really based on anything in your experience, learning nor feelings but solely holding on to His words believing that He is always good no matter what.
Life through Death
A seed needs to completely die before it can live a new. I am understanding that God is taking us deeper. He is revealing Himself a new. We may have been blind-folded with the past experiences that we put Him in a box. He needs to break the old wineskin so He can pour out new oil.
I have no doubt that my husband will live. Untimely death is just against His nature and heart. We still believe in healing and miracle. We still believe in this God that we serve. We still believe in Jesus!
But the how and when is something we don’t have any idea. God is taking us in this new wave of obedience, That we believe no matter what the situation is.
Because He is never an “I was” or an “I will”. He is the “I am” (present tense). Everyday is an adventure where He leads and we obey in love.
Excited what this adventure unfold…
Depression is a real demon. It comes cunningly and swift in times misery. It is a dangerous evil spirit that can overtake when one is not careful. Sharing this simple face to face experience with this devil to expose its works and show those under it how to be free in Jesus name.
I got a little depressed
Many of you know that our family is going through challenging times right now. In a previous blog, I shared with you the emotions I have to undergo as a wife whose Husband is battling sickness.
It has been 4 months since this has all started. And somehow in someway, the weight of this all took a toll on me…
Maybe it started with our main Nephrologist said that our only option now is just a kidney transplant. Maybe it came in when I had sleepless nights watching Jay endure a week of fever, weakness, chills, edema and shortness of breathing… I don’t know when it all came to place but I was face to face with depression. I was on the brink of giving in and allowing it to take me to the river of bitterness and disgust.
- I was always crying.
- I did not want to call for help.
- I got tired of asking people’s support: praying, provision.
- I did not want to eat.
- I did not want to see anyone.
- I just wanted to be alone.
- I did not care what people think.
- I did not feel like praying nor believing anymore.
It was both awful and tragic to be in. The good thing about it was that I was aware as it was all happening. I was in control. I did not let it in. Thus, before it can overtake me, I opened myself to people for accountability.
Depression’s Entry Points
Depression is real and many people go through this everyday. It comes in everyone’s door when one is not careful. Thus it is important that one will not allow oneself to be under stress, unrest and unstable foundations with God. In my case, I was under so much:
- Stress – because this has been going on for 4 months and it seems like we’re at the end of the line.
- Unrest – because we need a lot of money for Jay’s medications, dialysis and other family expenses every week. I had to work double time while managing the home, kids, schedules, etc.
- Unstable foundations with God – because what worked in my walk with God where I was seeing a lot of healing and miracles is not happening right now. I have to reestablish new foundations with the Lord.
How to Beat Depression
Freedom from depression is at hand. The power of God is available to anyone who calls on His name. But the person who’s experiencing it needs to make a decision that he or she doesn’t want it in his/her life.
Here are the steps I took:
- Cry it out – Don’t be hypocrite and religious in the eyes of God. Be real. Cry our your frustrations, questions, doubts but always make it a point to still TRUST Him no matter what. David Himself would tell God in his Psalms (Psalm 7; Psalm 27; Psalm 31; Psalm 34; Psalm 52), “Don’t turn Your ear away from me, O God… Don’t hide Your face when I’m distressed.” Cry your heart it. He listens, He understands…
- Eat and sleep – Yes as simple as that. Since your heart is mostly close for counsel during these times, just rest. Eat your favorite food (don’t pig out). Sleep… A lot. A rejuvenated body is a good cure for the wounded soul.Elijah did the same when he was in a lot of frustrations and fear. All his powerful experiences with God were all forgotten. He was so focused on his situation that he just hid himself under a broom tree. He was amiss.And in that time, the Lord did not condemn him. He send His angels instead to tend on Elijah. All Elijah did was eat “chiffon cakes” and snore his stress away.
- Decide to get help – Even if you don’t feel like it, you need it. Trust me… The moment I opened up to people, the more I started to process what I was going through and it helped me resolve the deeper issues in my heart. It made me become ready to receive from God again.
I appreciate the people who went out of their way in helping me press through.
Thank you to my Husband for His thoughts of me. Buying me the food that I like. Taking me to a massage. Spending time with me. It helped me a lot.
Thank you Ate Esther Revote for checking on us via text. I cried the whole time that afternoon. It meant a lot Te. Thanks for always giving your life to people no matter what circumstances you’re in. Love you Te.
Thank you to our dear Homegroup for the surprise serenade with food, balloons and flowers. For praying, listening and loving us this much. Thank you for being our family who lifts us up when we’re tired and weary. We love you all so much.
Depression is a real devil. But it is nothing in the light of God love through the embrace of His people.
Be there for someone today! It matters.
A People Destined to His Glory There’s no doubt that revival and reformation is coming to the Philippines. It is our call and destiny. It is an inheritance that was imprinted in our race from the beginning of time. It … Continue reading
It happened so fast. It came out of nowhere and we did not even have the chance to brace ourselves to it. “Chronic Kidney Disease” clearly came as a thief in the night…
The Death Sentence
We just noticed Jay getting weak and pale. We thought it was just because he worked night shift. We just actually went in for a check up to get a medical certificate so he can rest more but that decision led us to the valley of the shadows of death. Before we knew it, we were in a hospital emergency room with six specialists telling us that he needed emergency dialysis. Tests showed that his creatinine level is very high. The normal count for an adult male is 100 but his’ was 1588. The doctors said he will have at least 3 dialysis a week for the rest of his life. That only a kidney transplant will prolong his life…
Imagine the trauma… My husband is in his prime and our kids are still young. I couldn’t stop crying the first night we were in the hospital. Thoughts of death and being a widow at an early age flooded me. Fear gripped my heart on how will I raise my kids alone if Jay dies. My heart bled on the possibility of losing the love of my life this early.
I had all these thoughts agonizing my being but as the same time I had to be strong for Jay and those who love us. Thus, I rarely shed tears. Despite the emotional wreck inside, I had to push it aside and face the dilemma face on.
It was only the hope we have in Christ that held us altogether.
When you’re young and full on dreams, and the doctors will give your spouse that medical impression, your world will just crumble down. No amount of Christian maturity, training and healing experience can pacify the pain and fear of the unknown when you’re in that type of situation.
The devils are so real. We can literally feel their presence in the room. Especially after the doctors would come and tell you how your husband’s body is “dying” and needed immediate attention. It was a haunting feeling surpassing our faith. Despite being Christians and ministers for years, we were shaken. We had to hold on to Hope and believe despite the torment we were feeling inside.
The battle to stay in His shalom was real. We had to fight and establish ourselves in His word. We had to reflect on God’s destiny and call in our lives. We had to recall on the times He spoke over us through personal prophecy, dreams and visions. We had to remind ourselves on His love. We had to constantly create an atmosphere on hope. We had to fight. We had to believe.
We did this through these concrete actions:
- Playing worship songs all day and night
- Reading faith books like God’s Generals
- Meditating His truths in the Bible
- Watching faith preaching videos online: David Hogan, Bill Johnson
- Encouraging each other by faith by talking revelations and what God spoke to each other
- Praying every time an emotional or physical attack happens
- Sharing to others burdens to pray for
- Sharing to others testimonies of His goodness in the process
Jesus is Real
Yes our years in church and ministry told us that God is love and that He will never leave us and forsake us. But one will never know the reality of these truths until that person gets to apply them.
Being in that situation ourselves, we have proven that Jesus is real! His power is real. His blood works. The finish work of the cross gives life.
We faced the temptation of giving up countless of times. It was good when people are around to pray and encourage us; the faith level is high. But where we’re alone, demons would start creeping in again to shake your stability in the Lord. The lies would start again. One should really fight for that Peace to live in it no matter what.
It was in these moments however that we have proven God’s power. Because to be honest, we found ourselves failing a couple of times. It is only of His grace that we made it this far. He alone deserves all the glory and honor.
Night and Day
After two months, 2 hospitals, countless tests, and more than 10 doctors, God showed Himself strong! With all of our friends praying around the world, intercessions, prophecies and edifying scriptures, God has shown His favor and we have finally turned the corner of Hope:
- There was a change in the doctors impression. Before the impression was “Anemia secondary to Chronic Kidney Disease” and recently it was changed to “Acute Kidney Injury secondary to rapidly progressive Glomerulonephritis”.
- The last Nephrologist said that his kidneys shrank. Our recent Nephrologist said, both are in normal size. It’s just inflamed.
- Most of the CKD patients have constant or growing creatinine count even after doing dialysis sessions. Jay’s count is decreasing! It has gone from 1588 to 733 after 7 sessions.
- The Lord has provided everything that we’re able to pay hospital bills, treatments, supplements, house bills, and medications. Money came from friends and even those we don’t have previous relationships. People prayed both here and abroad. Charity events were made. Offerings were given. Tears were shed. All of which we’re very grateful of. This edified us knowing that we have a big family behind our back. The feeling is overwhelming. We are constantly brought to tears when we see His goodness in our lives in this situation.
What the devil schemed as hell turned out to be a bright display of His power in and through our lives.
Aside from learning that His power is manifested not because of what we do but because of who He is, we also learned these practical steps that we’ve like to share with you so you too can learn from this situation.
- Prioritize health. Jay’s lifestyle growing up wasn’t wise. He ate mostly processed foods (hotdogs, canned goods, chips) and loved vinegar and sour fruits. He also started staying up late at night at a young age. This all the more worsen when he worked night shift for years. He did not drink as much water as he needed but focused more on coffee and soda.So eat healthy and organic food. Sleep at least 8 hours a day at night. This is the time when our immune system can rebuild and fight for our body. Exercise and drink lots of water too!
- Limit fitness supplements intake. Jay remembered that few years back, he feasted on protein and creatinine drinks for fast muscle building.
- Take care of insurances. We stopped paying our health care, and other insurances because we did not feel like we needed it. Because of that mistake, we paid huge amounts of hospital bills. Thank God for His grace and provision.
- Treasure moments. Life is but a mist. Make sure you value relationships around you all the time.
- Choose a life with Jesus now. Being saved gave us an assurance that no matter what will happen, we will spend eternity with Jesus. But whether that time comes soon or not, we are also secure that He will take care of us in whatever situation we face. He is there to provide, heal and strengthen. He will never leave and forsake. He is there to always guide, even in the valley of the shadows of death!
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Know Jesus today. Know Him intimately… 🙂 ❤
For a century, she was battered and wounded.
Longed for love.
Confused of her identity.
Her children slaved all over the world.
Her home broken in every aspect.
Duterte happened and there’s a sense of hope.
Change is here.
Transformation can be at hand.
Her children can rest.
There is restoration!
There is reformation.
Is this a born again experience?
Can the Pearl shine bright again?
Is this the time for her calling?
Is this the time for destiny?
Whatever it maybe,
Nothing is impossible when we pray.
“Who hath heard such a thing? Who hath seen such things? Shall a land be born in one day? Shall a nation be brought forth at once? For as soon as Zion travailed, she brought forth her children.” – Isaiah 66:8 (ASV)
Do Not Fret!
Don’t you ever forget that this nation has a call. We may be little and unknown but God has placed a purpose in our race. He has given our people a mandate to bring the Gospel to the Middle East. We have a destiny. And no matter what’s going on today with all the changes happening under the Duterte administration, you have to trust that God has spoken! You have to have faith and stand in His words!
Yes Duterte is strengthening ties with China and Russia. Yes the Philippines is rocketing into an unknown future. These are changes no one expected. There are turns of events no one foresaw.
As people of God, should be we threatened? Should we be panicking to something that’s out of our control? Should we call it not the will of God?
God is looking for a people of faith. A people who will stand in His words. A people who will trust in His ways. Even if it doesn’t make sense…
It Must be God
What is the Philippines that can shake the sense of security of the world? Who are we that the nations would watch what’s going to happen next? Who is Duturte that leaders and institutions of the world are shaken with his stance?
We are supposedly nothing! We are poor and in debt. We don’t have influence and power like the nations with money and nuclear weapons. But why is this all happening? Intellectually speaking, it doesn’t make sense. Spiritually speaking however, it’s clear that this is the time and this is the hour when Filipinos need to rise up in their identity in Christ and walk in that calling and destiny bringing the Light in these darkest parts of the world.
These are not doors human mans closed. These are not doors human hands opened…
Yes China and Russia are known communists and persecutors of the gospel. The spirit of fear and intimidation tell us that this is the wrong route. Faith however tells us it’s time to bring these lost brothers back to the Father!
The Russian Ambassador himself said Russia needs the smiles of the Filipinos. They are cold and reserved culture. He acknowledged that there is that sense of joy in the heart of this culture that needs to be shared to Russia.
There is that window of opportunity for the Philippines to influence other nations like never before. Maybe not in silver and gold. But in the name of the God they have been serving for centuries now.
Virtue is the Strongest Weapon
That moment when the whole world stood still and paused. Selah… It is reflecting and reevaluating… Because all of sudden, it is not about the stock market anymore. It is not about territories and armories. Duterte happened and now it’s about virtues and ideals. It’s not about being big or small but being right or wrong. Hypocrisy is exposed. Manipulation and control are highlighted.
When the religious spirit came to accuse Duterte’s “bloody hands”, he then unmasked well-painted tombs where thousands of innocent blood are called “collateral damage”.
Justice is hovering on earth like never before. Where it doesn’t serve the powerful anymore. But those with purity and passion.
David and Goliaths
The Philippines is going through intense spiritual metamorphosis today. It’s messy and chaotic. But the fact that, its internal changes are affecting history boosts my hope that the words He spoke over this nation are slowly being realized. We will bring the gospel back to Jerusalem. We will be a people who will usher the second coming of the King. And it’s not because we have a strong army nor kingly armors. It’ll be because we are a people with covenant with the One True God.
Have faith. Choose to believe. Be a remnant.
Halloween is a Work of Hell
Halloween is a celebration of death and the evil. It is clearly demonic in nature. The pictures speak loudly aside from the obvious words like witches, ghosts, fairies, monsters, zombies… It doesn’t need a rocket science mind to see that halloween is a work of hell.
Those in sorcery and the occult can testify that welcoming demonic activities like halloween in our homes can be a subtle way of creating a covenant with the devil. It’s a form of declaration that evil spirits are accepted and their schemes. It is a possible foothold for a cursed life. Because once we give access to Satan, he will surely come to steal, kill and destroy.
Why Christians Should Not Celebrate Halloween
Jamie Morgan in her Charisma Magazine article listed these points below “Why Christians Absolutely Should Not Celebrate Halloween”:
- God is a God of life, but Halloween focuses on death. Should I celebrate a holiday where people decorate their front yards with tombstones?
- The Scriptures tell us to put away deeds of darkness (Rom. 13:12) and that light has nothing in common with darkness (2 Cor. 6:14). Is celebrating a dark holiday something a child of the light should be doing?
- I had been delivered from fear and panic attacks and knew that fear comes from the enemy. Should I participate in a holiday that has fear as its very foundation?
- Witchcraft is clearly detestable to the Lord (Deut. 18:10-13). Shouldn’t something that glorifies witchcraft (just take a walk through the Halloween store) be detestable to me as well?”
- Halloween is a sacred, high holiday for Wiccans (the official religion of witchcraft). Is this a holiday Christians should celebrate alongside Wiccans?
- Is it cute when we dress our kids like the devil (or witches, ghouls, scary characters and so on)? Isn’t it, well, demonic?
- What if my child dresses in a wholesome fireman costume? Romans 16:19 says that we need to be wise to what is good and innocent of evil. If I let him participate in Halloween, even while dressed as a fireman, aren’t I sending him a mixed message by allowing him to participate in a celebration of evil?
- The Lord said in 2 Corinthians 6:17, “Come out from them and be separate … Touch no unclean thing … .” Doesn’t God want His children to be set apart from the world and from sin and evil? Aren’t we supposed to be peculiar people?
- My extended family thinks it’s ridiculous that we not allow our son to dress up for Halloween. Should their opinions matter to me more than God’s? Shouldn’t pleasing God be my utmost concern?
- If there is even a question in my heart and mind that it might be wrong, shouldn’t that be my first clue? Why would I continue to do so with even a lingering thought that it is wrong?
- Does Halloween bring glory to God? No! It glorifies the devil! Enough said.
Parenting and Halloween
We can not avoid halloween around us. It is in the television, posters in the streets and decorations in the malls. So what should we, parents do to protect our children from it?
Even if we can’t avoid halloween we can also control how our children respond to it. Let’s teach them what is good and evil.
My twins are 3 years old and they now know heaven and hell. I guide them as they make decision on what’s godly and of the devil. I assist them to spiritually discern on their own.
This year they started noticing halloween (thank you Disney Junior and Nickelodeon!!!) 🙂 They immediately know it was wrong so I reinforced it with His word. Now, each time they see halloween related videos and photos — they tell me right away that it’s bad, it’s from hell, it’s not good…
If you’re a parent and have been doing this for your kids, good job!
If you’re a parent who wants to do this but don’t know where to start, here are some concrete steps that may help:
- Supervise television and tech time.
- Teach them Biblical foundations why it’s not from God (Deut. 18:10-13).
- Don’t join halloween costume parties.
- Don’t buy halloween-themed toys and treats.
- Commend good decision-making.
Let’s love our kids beyond giving the best vitamins, milk and material things. Let’s set them up for a blessed future. Let’s protect them from the cunning evil ready to puke sickness, disease and generational curses over their lives. Let’s close our doors to halloween and everything that’s not of God!
When Healing is “Not There”
For the past 2 weeks our family has been through tremendous storm. The twins and I got sick. Jay was rear-ended. We were challenged financially, physically and spiritually.
It was a hard battle. For “faith people” like Jay and I, it was easy to hold on the first week. We were constantly praying for healing and breakthrough. We had faith. We press through. Despite no one knowing about our fight, we looked to Jesus and held our breath.
But breakthrough did not come. And it was VERY challenging. In the past we have seen Jesus heal, cast out demons, change lives, provide and come down in power. So to pray and not see a tip of any miracle was exhausting.
Then it got worse…
On week 2, Tice did not just have fever but his nose also started bleeding. Sovi got ear infection needed to be attended by a physician. My strength wasn’t restored. We had extended expenses with the car window broken and some taxes for Jay’s new music gears from the US.
So we trusted and just held our breath even longer… It was irritating. It was uncomfortable. It was difficult. But in the midst of all that, we held on to that truth inside. He is faithful. He is Love.
Because when times come like God is absent, it doesn’t define who He is. I can remember S.J. Hill in his book “Enjoying God” describing this season as the “Dark Nights of the Soul”. These are the times when God stays distant because He desires that we pursue Him on our own. That we long for Him even if the boost of faith and fireworks of miracles are not there.
Thus when healing seems to be “not there” and other challenges in life slams you down, rejoice! Because there are the times when you are given the chance to love on Him on your own. This is your opportunity to prove to Him that He is worth it, that He is your all in all… that you love Him not when things are good and steady, but even in the midst of pressures. This is what real love is all about.
Trials are also the times for growth. When we embrace pain, our faith muscle grow. Our strength is renewed to take new flights and new heights.
Bottom line of the matter is: our ups and downs in life don’t define God. It defines what’s in our heart. And our responses will always promote us when we choose humility and trust.
Perfect Love with Imperfect Pasts I married a perfect man… NOT! 🙂 He isn’t that all bad either. But we have issues especially in the first few years of our marriage. And it was definitely not because of him alone. Most … Continue reading